I've had one cell that made it through a two-year contract in one piece. It was the first one I ever had. It probably helped that it was the size and weight of a brick.

Since then not a single phone has passed the test. One didn't survive its trip into the shower, another fell into the toilet and a few were dropped. Lately, they've just been committing suicide before I have the chance to off them. I think they're on to my strong dislike of phones and just decide a life as Allie's Phone isn't a life worth living. I can't say that I blame them, but it'd be nice to be able to reserve my phone purchases for contract renewal discounts.

This contract period has seen the death of three phones. Two to technical glitches that were beyond both my control and the warranty. My third and most recent phone was an Ebay purchase from some company in Hong Kong. It was never a great phone (mostly because it insisted on the "Hello Moto!" ringtone and would not stay changed no matter how many times I tried to fix it) but it worked. Right up until it spontaneously shattered.


It was spontaneous, I swear!

I'm pretty sure this is the Technology Gods telling me I shouldn't get an iPhone.

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You came to me a hand-me-down
A couch much loved and old.
Your stitching still immaculate
Your color still so bold.

I took you up to Lausanne 3
(The pimpest room of all)
And put you in a place of pride
Right up against the wall.

You soon became an icon there,
A bright orange installation.
We brought to you our brand new friends
And some infatuations.

You were on the receiving end,
Of many a co-ed butt.
And even under all that weight
You never got a rut.

You had your share of spills and stains,
Of sodas, beer and wine.
A simple dab with paper towels
And once again you'd shine.

For you were like an armored car
Impervious to wear
Your zig-zag fabric shimmering
No matter who slept there.

And when you went off campus
To the Cottage you did go.
To face a brand new challenge:
The dastardly Clio.

I hope you know I loved you
As if I were your mother
Even when I had to move
And leave you with my brother.

I'm not sure what all happened there,
But I have my suspicions.
And I'm impressed you endured so well
Under such conditions.

When I reclaimed you once again
You were a little worn.
The fabric had since faded
But not a single hole was torn.

You went with me from house to house
And welcomed home two boys
Your cushions hold the memories
Of ten years worth of joys.

You were more than just the place
Where bottoms went and farted
I hope you know I'll miss you,
My dear old couch departed.

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Ryan met our kitty-corner backyard neighbor lady this afternoon.

Neighbor: Do you have a bird?
Ryan: Like a pet?
Neighbor: Yeah, an exotic bird. A cockatoo maybe?
Ryan: Nope, no bird.
Neighbor: Hmm. Someone around here does.
Ryan: Really?
Neighbor: Yeah, we can hear it every so often. It's like they take it out for a walk or something.
Ryan: ...

And on the other side of the continent, Marty starts laughing and doesn't know why.

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He's made a lot of progress since we first were reading this book.



(It's only the first half of the book because of the upload limit on blogger. Rest assured he does know what the sheep, donkey and owl say! Donkey is my personal favorite. Next time you see Cael you'll have to ask him to demonstrate...)

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We're working on potty training Cael. It's going very, very slowly. He'll go in the potty if he happens to have to go when it's time for a diaper change, but other than that he's pretty much a diaper guy still.

In an attempt to encourage pooping in the potty, we flush his poops down the toilet and tell him that's where poop belongs. He likes to wave goodbye to it when it goes. He's actually pretty enthusiastic about the whole thing, but so far it hasn't translated into actually wanting to make a direct deposit.

Today, Cael and I were playing on the floor while Finn was having some tummy time on a blanket nearby. Finn passed some gas (loudly) and Cael ran over to him, waved at Finn's bottom and said, "Bye bye, boop!"

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