That's right. Vaughn is alive. The show is dead, but he's back! And that, my dear readers, is all that matters. Tune in next Wednesday where he may even have more than 3 seconds of screen time! /giddy

This may come as a shock to you... but I think I get unhealthily attached to fictional characters. I've got this problem where I start watching (or - heaven forbid - reading) a series and it's like I develop a personal relationship with the faux-people.

It's not that I'm a huge TV person, or a big bookworm... it's just that I attach myself to a character and I MUST be a part of their life. The Stephanie Plum Series, the Elvis Cole series -- those books are deadly. I start reading and I can't stop. Ever. And then I read the series again and again. Just try pulling the book from my weary hands at 4 in the morning -- it's just about as hard as trying to get me to read something new.

The best thing to happen to me? DVD box sets of TV series. It's like my personal drug. You can pick a show... and watch the entire thing from start to finish. No pesky commercials... no silly reruns! I don't like my drugs diluted! Just give it to me straight!

Current addiction: Firefly. Why on earth did they cancel this show? It was brilliant. You must all go rent it (only 14 episodes) and then watch the movie (Serenity). Oh, but you'll have to imagine that they get together in the end. CAUSE THAT'S WHAT WOULD HAPPEN! I know these characters. That is what would happen!

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True story from a day in the life of Ryan.

Mike is the bartender at the restaurant where Ryan works -- and they're not really friends. Not at all. So, Ryan was a bit surprised when Mike came up to him:

Mike: Hey dude... when was the last time you smoked pot?
Ryan: Um... I, uh... I tried it once in college. Didn't sit well.
Mike: You taking any heavy meds?
Ryan: Er... I'm taking Nyquil.
Mike: Perfect. Dude, you could totally help me out.
Ryan: Um. What's going on?
Mike: Dude. I need some pee.
Ryan: Oh. Um. You have to take a test for work?
Mike: No, bro. I got this custody thing for my fuckin kids.
Ryan: Ah.
Mike: I need some piss by Wednesday. [Mike whips out a water bottle] Think you could take a little pee?
Ryan: [Lying through his teeth] Oh, man. Very unfortunate, but I just relieved myself about 15 minutes ago.
Mike: No way, man. That sucks.
Ryan: Yeah.
Mike: I need it by Wednesday, dude. And I see you're not on the schedule. Can you come in and do it tomorrow?
Ryan: Oh, well, I don't know. I've got lots to do tomorrow.
Mike: Man, this sucks. I asked Sean and he said he wouldn't even do it for his best friend. What kind of bullshit is that, man.
Ryan: That's rough.
Mike: Totally. So are you going to be able to make it in?
Ryan: No, dude. Sorry.
Mike: Alright, dude, well I'll call you tomorrow around noon and see if you can come in. I need some piss by Wednesday.
Ryan: ...

Poor Ryan first thought he was being hit up for a drug deal of some sort and it turns out he's wanted for his cleanliness and ability to urinate.

I told him to take the halo off his head before going into work.

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/rawr...

For updates on the nuptials tune in to:

www.ryanandallie.blogspot.com

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