Ode to the Orange Couch

You came to me a hand-me-down
A couch much loved and old.
Your stitching still immaculate
Your color still so bold.

I took you up to Lausanne 3
(The pimpest room of all)
And put you in a place of pride
Right up against the wall.

You soon became an icon there,
A bright orange installation.
We brought to you our brand new friends
And some infatuations.

You were on the receiving end,
Of many a co-ed butt.
And even under all that weight
You never got a rut.

You had your share of spills and stains,
Of sodas, beer and wine.
A simple dab with paper towels
And once again you'd shine.

For you were like an armored car
Impervious to wear
Your zig-zag fabric shimmering
No matter who slept there.

And when you went off campus
To the Cottage you did go.
To face a brand new challenge:
The dastardly Clio.

I hope you know I loved you
As if I were your mother
Even when I had to move
And leave you with my brother.

I'm not sure what all happened there,
But I have my suspicions.
And I'm impressed you endured so well
Under such conditions.

When I reclaimed you once again
You were a little worn.
The fabric had since faded
But not a single hole was torn.

You went with me from house to house
And welcomed home two boys
Your cushions hold the memories
Of ten years worth of joys.

You were more than just the place
Where bottoms went and farted
I hope you know I'll miss you,
My dear old couch departed.