Smells Like Savings

My sophomore year in college, I decided I wanted to have a smell. You know how certain smells remind you of certain people? Like when someone breezes by you wearing a particular cologne and as soon as it hits your nose you are struck with memories of a particular individual… I wanted that. I wanted people to think of me when they smelled something good. So I went to the perfume counter and tested out the different fragrances in an attempt to find a particular scent that I would use for the rest of my life.

I came home, a happy customer, with a brand new product. I wore it everyday and loved it dearly. Somewhere along the line I stopped wearing it daily and began to wear it only on special occasions. But now, as I have commenced a new chapter of my life, I have decided that in order to reach my previous goal, I will wear my perfume daily.

And can I just say – love. I love this stuff. I find myself sticking my wrist up to my nose just so I can get a better sniff of it. It is the most comforting and pleasant smell I’ve ever had the fortune to happen across. So I would like to applaud sophomore Allie on her wonderful taste. I can definitely see myself wearing this forever. I can’t get enough of it. Although, I am going to have to stop smelling myself in public. The stares I get are less than flattering.

It recently occurred to me, however, that I have come across this smell before. It hit me the other day, when I had my nose pressed against my wrist… it smells like flowers. Not real flowers. Play Doh flowers. I remember vividly a large white plastic faux-woven basket with holes in it where you put the flower patterns. Then when you moved the handle, the Play Doh would come squishing out, in typical Play Doh fashion. What made this particular item special was not its shape, but its smell. The dough was scented. Now this is what gets me. My perfume is not floral. It’s almond scented - and a dead ringer for Play Doh flowers. Now who’s the confused marketer?

Don’t you love it when junk emails are personalized? “Hello Allie. It’s true! You can now stop paying retail… and START saving up to 85 percent on all your PrinterInk and Toner cartridge needs.” Well, thank you very much Mr. PrinterInk8797 for your generous offer. Since we’re close enough that you can call me Allie, can I call you STOP EMAILING ME YOU FREAK? Seriously, the subject title is “Allie - 'Alwâys uptô [85percent] sâvi.” You tricky little buggers. You got me! I thought you were a good friend of mine ‘cause you had my name in the subject! You’re so sneaky!!